Basically my now 18 yo son abruptly moved into his Mum's place 4 months ago hasn't answered my emails etc. He was seeing a psychiatrist for depression.
I spoke to a counselor and we have agreed that circumstances don't match his depression behaviour. Mainly because he is in contact with my parents and my sister. The feedback from sister is that he is avoiding because he has taken sides with his mother on our divorce 16 years ago.
The counselor and I agree that it's up to him to make the first step in the reconciliation. I feel that I don't know why I spent 16 years in conflict with ex and the family law industry to ensure I had a significant time and a good relationship with him. It would have been much easier and less stressful to simply walk away from both of them.
I am not exactly feeling the dreads that you got when a close relationship breaks down, but I do think about him a lot and my jaw has become sore and stiff.
Somedays are worse than others. This weekend it was his 18th birthday and I found out yesterday my parents, sister and niece went out to dinner with him on Saturday night. Basically mum said he is very happy and he has turned into a fine young man. I replied that its great that he is happy now that I'm not a part of his life.
Please note that there was no conflict from my side and none that I was aware of from his side. So I have no idea why he hates me so much
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1. I have only one son and he's 18 in March.Until recently, he used to spend one week at my place and one at his mother's. He apparently had some sort of depressive episode and a couple of weeks later he decided to stay permanently at his Mum's and haven't seen him since. Doesn't reply to texts or emails, but has been visiting my sister. Has moved his stuff from my place when I'm not home without letting me know. 2. I worry he doesn't like me any more. I have depression myself and initially my counselor just said this behaviour is just him moving away to look after himself. Only thing recent events which I won't go into suggest he has big problems with me. My counselor and i agree that I just start looking after myself and get on without factoring him into my decisions. At nearly 18, he should take responsibility for his actions. I'm also still recovering from aortic valve replacement due to endocarditis. So that is still a concern in my life. I have torn my hamstring 2 days before Xmas which limits my ability to exercise and therefore fight depression at the moment. 3. I am on a very low income at the moment so there are not many opportunities to treat myself. I suppose I ride a bike, swim and run. 4. I feel betrayed by my son at the moment. I don't suppose that is a positive thing to say he taught me 5. Not sure if I have any questions at the moment. It's just waiting to see what the future brings and dealing with it as it comes
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