09-16-2022 11:45 PM
09-17-2022 02:22 PM
Thank you for reaching out on the Parents Forum, please know that you are not alone and that we are here to listen.
I'm so sorry that this is happening, and it's understandable that you are in tears and very upset by the situation. It is clearly very distressing, and in addition to your son needing support, you also need some support and we want to ensure that you are ok.
Engaging with the professionals seems like a good first step but if you don't feel that you're getting anywhere, have you looked at other resources? I'll send you an email with some additional information, so please keep an eye out for that.
08-16-2023 03:06 AM
Oh my gosh @Megstar24 I am going through similar issues with my daughter and it is horrendous to see a loved one going through the drug induced psychosis and yes the things they say are unbelievable. I certainly feel your pain. I had a meltdown yesterday evening while talking to my Doctor and the adrenaline drain of blubbering to my Doctor has made my body so weak and sick to the stomach. I need help as I just can't cope as it is affecting my mental wellbeing. So I am going to have to talk to a phycologist as there is no one else I can talk to so this is my desperate attempt for trying to cope with what is going on.
I am not to sure what I can discuss on these forums but I had to ring someone for help and advice and they organised a compulsory treatment team to go into our house and remove her to a treatment centre but after a few day she applied for a 2 hour release but she absconded. She is not responding to any of her texts, phone calls and only went to one appointment they are going to hold a tribunal to discuss her condition so I don't know how this is going to turn out.
I am glad you have contacted this forum it seems it is all you can do is keep searching for advice and help through these web sites.
I keep talking to my daughter about rehab but she says she does not know what she is going to do ?? I suggested a farm type one where they take money from your Centrelink payment, she gave up work just over a year ago and has been living off her savings.
All the best.
08-16-2023 03:21 PM
I wanted to jump in after reading through your post. I am sorry to hear that you are going through such a tough time at the moment with your daughter. It sounds like it has been a really difficult time for you and your family to be managing.
I know you mentioned that you spoke to your doctor yesterday and had a meltdown, and from what you have shared it sounds like this is very understandable and completely normal. I can hear how much of a difficult time this is for you and you deserve all the support available to you - especially through your doctor.
I can hear how much and how hard you are trying to help your daughter and she is so lucky to have you. This is a lot to be dealing with and the fact that you haven't given up on her, and are still trying to support her in every way shows just how much you care and how hard you are trying.
In saying that, it is so important that you are also taking care of yourself and prioritising your own wellbeing and mental health. It is equally as important that you too are receiving all the support available to you.
I was wondering what your supports look like and whether you have any support from family, friends or other mental health professionals? I know you mentioned that you are going to be speaking to a psychologist which is really great to hear, do you know when that will be?
Thinking of you and your family.
Take care and we hope to hear back from you soon.
08-16-2023 07:22 PM
Today has been agonising after going through adrenaline torture your body falls flat. My G.P has to do a mental check on me so as to write a referral for seeing the Phycologist and that is about 10 days away, contacted Phycologist to make an appointment after I get the referral, he is ringing me tomorrow and a little concerned as to maybe he can't take me on a a patient.
My daughter today had me in tears today and it is frightening as to what strange things she is doing and saying. My hubby wants to basically boot her out but I fear where she will end up and in what condition it is something I just can't do. If things really heat up with her behaviour I certainly will ring the health department for help again, there is no way she will go to rehab. I am so scared as to what she is going to do to herself with this poison in her body, so it is like you are imprisoned in your own home.
I am going to my sisters for a while to get a break from the sadness I see in her whole self, I honestly can't keep watching her in this state. I have seen so much from my son who was a heroin addict from age 14 he walked down the wrong track of drugs and prison and it was unbearable to see all that. He is in his late forties and still can't get off Methadone.
I only have my husband to talk to. He is at the stage of selling the house or renting it and taking off as really it is our time now, and we have been through enough during our lifetime.
My body lives with heaps of stress and I have been through breast cancer, had half my thyroid removed and just writing this makes me feel nauseous.
08-16-2023 10:31 PM
Hi there @LeeBelle ,
It sounds like you and your husband are going through so much at the moment. It is no wonder it has taken a toll on your body. It must be so hard to watch your son, and now your daughter go down this path. Please know you are not alone in this.
I am glad your GP was able to help you with the referral to see a psychologist. It's so important that you have a safe space to talk about what's going on for you. Speaking to someone can bring clarity to the situation. It can also give you hope and strength.
Does your husband have someone to speak to as well - if he needs it?
Hang in there @LeeBelle . We are sitting with you.
08-17-2023 01:35 PM
I wanted to start by saying thank you again for being so open and genuine in sharing your life story. I can see that here and on your other posts you've been making a space to share your experiences for others to see and learn from them. You have been through a lot with your children, and I see that you are still going through an agonising process. It must have been terrifying and emotionally exhausting to see what your daughter was doing and saying yesterday, especially after what you've experienced with your son. Knowing that your husband wants to boot her out of your home and is planning to sell or rent your house would be an extra stress on your efforts to look after her, though I'm glad that you can talk to your husband about these issues too. I see that you have a strong plan of what to do next by ringing the health department if the situation gets worse, even if you don't know if your daughter will go into rehab. Knowing where you can turn for help is always the first step.
I see that you're also taking steps to look after yourself, like seeing your sister to get a break from the situation. It's good to hear that you have been able to get in contact with your GP and are seeking psychological support- getting that professional input can be invaluable. But I'm sorry to hear that you are concerned that he won't be able to take you on as a patient. Is there any reason that you have this concern? While you're waiting to find out, is there anything you can do to look after yourself?
You mentioned that aside from your husband you have nobody to talk to about this issue. I wanted to flag some potential helplines you could contact if you were looking for some extra support. Firstly, there is the Family Drug Support Hotline, which is a telephone support service for families affected by drug use. They also have online support groups if you're interested. I also wanted to introduce you to Beyond Blue's counselling service if you weren't familiar with it already. They're a free counselling service available online or via telephone in Australia. While you're waiting to hear back from your GP and psychologist, you may find it helpful to contact someone when you're going through so much.
We're always here to listen to you and are thankful that you could find this space. Looking forward to hearing from you soon.
08-19-2023 12:41 AM
Thank you for the other links I can look into. I am just way too drained to do much at the moment.
The Phycologist got back to me have a week to wait, was concerned about not getting in for any help for months and feared how I could cope waiting a long time.
Today spent a lot of time in bed my body feels so totally run down with no energy, felt a little anger today as I said to my husband tonight, well nothing has changed today, daughter in bed all day, just felt like a slow ground hog day and felt angry as things seem to happen as like there is nothing wrong. My hubby has never been one for talking about anything personal for professional help, he deals with it as he sees it, yes it frustrates me. He deals with stresses in a complete different way to me.
The saddest thing is how her siblings cope with her. They witnessed a bad Psychosis day, evening with her while we were away and now they won't let the younger grand kids visit our home, but yesterday obviously in need of desperate babysitting three grand kids came over. My daughter never came out of her room to connect with them and she was an absolute favourite Aunt who did so much for them over the past 10 years. The eldest realises something is not right with her fave Aunt and says oh ***** in bed still.
It was a pleasure for me to see them laughing etc and I was teaching youngest how a record player works and he says were is the remote and wondering how the music goes through the wiring to the speakers, eldest loved dancing around to an AC/DC record. I felt happy for those few hours.
I think living with what I have for over 30 years really derailed my happiness and dreams in life. Having no friends or family has been agonising, you might try and talk about issues to hubby's side of family but nothing seems to sink in as they have the happy genes running through their veins and are on their happy journey's.
08-19-2023 04:46 PM
Hi @LeeBelle ,
Thank you for responding. I'm glad to hear you were able to speak to the psychologist and the wait will be about a week. What a relief that you didn't have to wait months for support.
I'm sorry to hear how tired and run down you are feeling at the moment. With the constant worry, it is understandable that you feel like you don't have energy and are worn out. It must be so hard that your husband doesn't see the need for other supports including professional supports. I read that you find it hard to speak to him about these things because he just doesn't get it. I recognise that his family don't really have an understanding either, and that can leave you so isolated.
On the flip side, it's good to hear you had a few hours of reprieve when the kids came over. It must have felt so liberating to be able to laugh and have fun with them. How old are they? I read that the eldest has noticed something isn't right with their once much loved aunt. Have you ever considered what you could say to them?
I hope you are able to get the support you need. That is, put on your own oxygen mask before saving others.
By connecting with others on the forums, I hope you will feel less isolated in this part of your journey. Remember, you are not alone.
We look forward to hearing from you.
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