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"I'm busy can you visit next week?" Past three weeks. I miss my son.

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"I'm busy can you visit next week?" Past three weeks. I miss my son.

Casual scribe

"I'm busy can you visit next week?" Past three weeks. I miss my son.

My son is 20 months old, he lives 20 minutes from me.  My son is delightful and I enjoy the time I spend with him each week for a few hours.  However for the past three weeks my son has been unavailable to spend time with me as his parent says they are too busy this week so can I visit next week.  But next week did not come the past three weeks.  I miss my son.


Each week that I am disappointed saddens me.  This feels wrong.  This can't be right. 


Am I powerless to see my child?  I know some people have legal battles but I have heard these can be very nasty, expensive and futile.  Is there a solution so I can spend time with my son?  Or maybe I should accept that I have lost my son.  I write this with sadness.

Sorry to be a downer but I need some advice.

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Re: "I'm busy can you visit next week?" Past three weeks. I miss my son.

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Hi @BeansBeansMagic ,


I can hear how much you love your son, and it sounds like it would be incredibly painful and frustrating  for you not being able to see him. I have small kids myself, and 20 months is such a delightful age Heart 


You and your son definitely deserve to have meaningful and regular time together, there's a few services that should be able to give you some assistance and support through this time, and hopefully help you and your son's other parent work out the arrangements that are best for all of you. 


Family Relationships Advice Line is a free phone service that  helps families affected by relationship or separation issues, including information on parenting arrangements after separation. It can also refer callers to local services that provide assistance.


Relationships Australia can also support you both in helping to work out a parenting plan - this a written agreement between you and son's other parent, that covers everything from how you communicate, how you share the care of your son, putting your child's best interests at the center of all decisions. I've just attached a copy here if you think it would be helpful to have a read through. 


Parenting plans are generally a first step that doesn't involve the legal system, there are mediators who can help to support you through the process, and there's also a new digital service that might be helpful for you called amica . 

Relationships Australia can also help out with support and mediation services - I've linked to an information place that shows you where you can find those services near you. 


I hope that's not too much information overload! 


Do you have family or friends who can help support you through this time? Family separation can be an incredibly stressful and lonely time, it's really important to reach out for help and support if you're struggling. Please keep us posted on how you get on - thanks so much for reaching out here. 


Casual scribe

Re: "I'm busy can you visit next week?" Past three weeks. I miss my son.

Thanks for your reply.  I do have some family that I talk with.  A written agreement and mediation would be good.  I hope it could help me visit my son each week instead of maybe see him at some point unknown.