how to deal with our daughter lying about us?

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how to deal with our daughter lying about us?

I don’t know what to do. Our 15 year old daughter lies about us to friends, teachers and has said she wants to contact cps so she can live on her own, just because we set normal boundaries and rules down, and have normal expectations to her like I think most parents have to their teenagers.

We are finding this very hard to deal with, as we know we are loving and caring parents that do our best for her. We literally don’t understand at all where all of this is coming from, and it’s breaking my heart.

We love her very much and have tried to help her for almost 3 years now, because she suffers from depression and anxiety. And we have done everything we can to get her and us in touch with the right people to help her. We even contacted cps who did an investigation almost 2 years ago, because we were so worried about her and felt like we could use their help. All they could help us with was some therapy for me and my husband, to help us better deal with our daughters emotional breakdowns/anger.

Now because we don’t feel like she is old enough or mature enough to live on her own, and has her issues to deal with, we don’t feel like it would be safe to let her live on her own, she has resulted into trying to turn this on us so that she can get her way and move away from home and into a studio or apartment alone.

We know that this is not something that she will get anywhere with. But it hurts so much, and I don’t understand why or how she can do this.

If any of you have advice or input, I would really appreciate it.
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Re: how to deal with our daughter lying about us?

Hi @Ninni

Balancing boundaries and freedom can be incredibly difficult. It sounds like you have been doing your best to be a good parent despite her pushing back against you. The fact that you have spoken to CPS and have sought counselling in regards to how to help her shows just how much you want to do the right thing for her. It must also be quite scary thinking about her moving out when you don't feel she is ready for it. It definitely sounds like supporting her has been taking a huge toll on your own mental health. It's important you are getting the right support for yourself, not only for your own well being but so you are in a better place to support her too. I'm wondering if you have tried parentline for some advice on what to do in this situation? Please do continue to seek support from the forum, perhaps other parents have had similar experiences here?  @taokat @sunflowermom @Orbit64

 

Savannah- RO