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Concerned2019
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11-21-2018
04:02 AM
1 Like
Aw thank you for your lovely reply. She has a loving home for sure. She won't go to social clubs due to confidence but we are talking to the school about possibly getting her into a club and making it like she has no choice. She goes by school rules so much so if it's a subtle group she will go if it's classed as a school activity. Things are so messed up. Friends and family are telling us we not tough enough but they don't understand her Asperger's, in fact some don't believe and some can't be bothered to learn. She's come home today saying her"friend" upset her. Maybe it's a friendship we have to accept and hope she sees sense in the end. I really appreciate all the replies, it helps me vent cos sometimes I'm emotional wreck and don't know where to turn next. As a mum I just want to fly in scoop her up and make it all go away but I can't. My husband has been amazing too.we are just stuck. Hit wall with things we can do. I guess we will figure it out somehow. A friend told me today we need to be firmer but they have no experience with aspergers. It definitely makes things tricky. Thanks for listening ❤️
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11-15-2018
10:30 PM
Oh sorry did I mention a name? I really don't feel that I can let her near my house. We have just tried everything and my daughter got so upset that we tried to stop her seeing her friend that now they think it might be good idea for us to come across as the good ppl and let this friend trip herself up. My daughter sees some bad things about her but so far it's not enough. Worst time of my life and my families life. Scared to upset her but wanting to get her to see sense.
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11-15-2018
07:45 PM
Thanks so much for your lovely comment. We have a car worker who actually started with us a week before all this started, she was assigned to us to help as my husband also has autism and I have epilepsy. She's been amazing through it all and she's mainly just listened, I dunno if she appreciates what an impact she has had on us. She also works with the school so she goes in I think 3 days a week and my daughter goes to her class and learns about friendships and all that, but for some reason she keeps going back to this other girl. I was filled with so much hatred for her but we have decided to try forget about her and concentrate on my daughter. She came home other day asking to go out and play with her. Honestly is that a joke... But it got us thinking so we called care worker and she thinks maybe we should try another way and let her play with her and she will see what she's like but keep it very strict. She said maybe show my daughter I don't hate her even though I do and invite her over to the house that way I can see whats what, I'm struggling with that idea just now. Can I really have the person who I feel influenced my girl to self harm in my house. I'm a very placid person, in no way have feelings of well I dunno but I'm not a mad kinda person but mess with my kids and something just gets my heart. I'm truly grateful to have the care worker who has guided us and listened to our feelings of guilt worry and just heartbroken parents. It's helping typing here too. I just don't know how ill ever relax again unless my daughter is in the same room as me for life. I just thank God I had her Instagram password. Thank God I am a good mum and didn't just let her get on with it. She didn't like I had the password, point proven I think now though.
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11-14-2018
11:48 PM
Thank you for your comment. I am lucky she tells me things although I found out about self harming by going through her Instagram account. I'm now just at a stage of...to My daughter... You know she does all this but you want to be her friend vid you don't have other friends due to anxiety. We feel her Asperger's is a big impact on this situation that now we don't know what to do. If she didn't have Asperger's I think we would handle it differently. But she does and we feel have to handle it more sensitive. I dunno guess I'm just at a loss and needed to talk to someone other than my family. When your child wants to be friends with someone that ya see is negative on her but she don't see it or does but doesn't want to be on her own so any friend is better than none.
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11-14-2018
08:56 PM
We are in process of waiting lists for therapy but she. We asked her to call a help line. Next day she told this girl and she said your parents are over reacting big time. She puts us down to our daughter and disses the help lines
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11-14-2018
08:54 PM
Thank you so much. I'm scared to sleep at night incase she's doing that. We take shifts to sleep. Can't imagine at this time ever feeling safe again. She had a good life before, the trust was there now she says can't you trust me.. Like really are you serious.
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11-14-2018
07:42 PM
Hi everyone. I just signed up there. My Girl is 12 yr old and she has Aspergers . She had 2 main friends in high school, 1 bullied the other and she was very stressed being put in the middle but the bullied girl left to go to a new school. so now my girl is left with the bully girl who she thinks is her best friend. I keep an eye on her Instagram account which she hated but by doing that I found out my girl was self harming. I can't type that without crying. phew ok so I then find out the bully girl self harms too and her mum doesn't mind cos she done it when she was younger!!! This girl also says she's bisexual which now my girl says she thinks she's gay (I don't care if she is) but its such a coincidence all these things. Ive learnt that the bully girl has told mine that she herself has clinical depression, ADHD and a lot of other things which now my girl worries about her and I've discovered these are all lies. my girl now knows she lied but she's still her best friend. We are worried sick. My son who is her twin is heartbroken too and thinks its his fault cos they bicker sometimes, of course I've told him not but he has Autism and struggles. My husband and I never dreamed she would ever self harm. The bully girl runs into school all happy and pulls up her sleeve happily showing my girl her new cuts, glorifying it. School were horrified but the bully girls mum didn't show up for a meeting. I'm feeling like there is gonna be nothing else to do about her. School have moved them in the class like separated them but they still meet up at break and lunch. I had so much hatred for the bully that it was starting to take over my mind, she's only 12 yr old so I had to pull myself together then my girl came home asking to go out to play with her after school!!. Im at a loss..My girls self harm was not deep cuts, almost like paper cuts so I reckon she knew it was wrong but cos this other girl was saying "it feels too good" I think she went with it. She promises never to do it again but I'm struggling to trust her now. Thank you for reading and my advice to anyone is keep checking social media. it could save your child. Heartbroken mum
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Public Statistics
| Date Registered | 11-14-2018 07:26 PM |
| Date Last Visited | 11-21-2018 06:02 AM |
| Total Messages Posted | 7 |
| Total Likes Received | 1 |
