The k you so much for taking the time to provide such a considered answer. Unfortunately in the craziness of the situation my partner has decided to stay at his parents over Easter instead of with me. We will try to work though this but you have given me lots of points that make me feel like I’ve not done the Wrong thing. Thank you again so much. Sounds like you have lots of experience.
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I’ve been with my partner for 3 years, he stays with me on the weekends as he lives 2 hours away. His son has often come along since he was 16 years old. Earlier this year my partners son came to stay with me for “a while” with me (he is now 18) because his relationship broke down with his mum and she three him out for not being respectful (going out to all hours, not doing anything to help around the house, hooning in his car, speaking badly to his mum and taking drugs) He’s been with me for over 3 months. ( his dad still lives away) and I have two of my own kids. I noticed that he was regularly high when coming home, he didn’t engage with me or my kids very often and certainly did nothing around the house. It was all ok though until I realised how his behaviour was affecting my kids. Not to mention that he doesn’t look for work and does nothing all day nd his dad just gives him money even though he talks like crap to him. I’ve been encouraging my partner to think about moving down permanently and support his child with a home for themselves. He has bern sweeping the issues under a rug and doesn’t think his drug taking was an issue. Easter was coming up and recently his son had been bringing his girlfriend around every day to mine. I made a rule that this could not occur every day as it’s a small home and I don’t provide it for him to bring his girlfriend to use the house. He didn’t like this rule and so has packed up all his stuff and left in an angry state. This has driven a wedge between me and my partner because he has now no other option than to move down to provide him with a home ( we had plans to build our own together but that doesn’t look good now) so mNy other things have happened but I know I can’t live with his disrespectful and lazy son. Is our relationship over? Can we recover? Did I do the right thing by enforcing the rules?
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