Hey guys, Brand new to this site but looking for some advice. My 13 year old boy is going through a really tough patch at the moment. I'm going to try keep this somewhat brief .. I have recently found a disturbing picture he drew of a hanging noose and the words "trapped in hell, end it all" .. prior to this I genuinely had NO idea he was so troubled. I noticed some changes in his behaviour but had put it down to his age .. he has a big group of friends, he is getting his best ever grades at school .. After finding the picture I spoke to him saying I had noticed he was seeming a little blue and it opened up some discussions between us .. he admitted that his recent diagnosis of alopecia had him worried about the future, aside from that he really didn't give me much more insight. I asked him if he would attend a local mental health place for teens with me, he declined. I asked him if he had ever had suicidal thoughts and he said no. In hindsight I wish I had made an appt and just taken him without fully revealing what we were doing, I know thats not ideal but he is the kind of kid that really needs a push sometimes .. The next week he seemed to have perked up, he spent more time with us doing family stuff which he would normally exclude himself from, we played board games each night, we talked more .. I genuinely thought he was 'coming good' and just needed to connect with us more .. Yesterday I noticed his iPad under his bed, I often have a quick look through his devices to try get inklings on whats going on (again, not ideal, I know!).. I looked through his google history and he has watched 2 youtube clips on how to tie a hanging noose .. these were very recent watches, from after the week where I thought he had perked up. I don't want to talk directly to him about what I have found obviously. He got home from school yesterday and said he had hurt his toe and couldn't attend karate. I needed to take the others in and was super nervous about leaving him at home. I just don't know what to do. Im currently looking for help online and came across this page, I'm going to contact a few local places .. I feel sick to my stomach with worry. When he gets home tonight I plan to talk to him again and show him the resources on this page .. what else can I do? Any suggestions? Thanks in advance, a stressed mumma!
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