Hi Franny, you love your boy and feel you should step in and help him . That's normal, because you care. However as kids turn into teens all they want to do is be adults as fast as possible, dating , physical and mental experimentation, adventures are all high on their priority list, listening to mum or dad isn't . Regardless of how good parent teen relationships are there is the driving reality of hormones as young boys and girls take their first tentative steps to adulthood.  I am thinking don't ban the phone don't ban dating, support your son through gritted teeth ,because that way you may be able to exercise some slight control and prevent future disasters. Try and get him to realise that sexting may seem harmless enough but once it's out there its out there forever. If something goes wrong people can lash out and his photo's could end up coming back to harm his future. I remember at 13 having a big crush on a 15 year old girl from what some people might unkindly refer to as the wrong side of the tracks.My mother definitely did not approve, she didn't stand in my way. Gave me permission for safe dates , like the beach ,going to early sessions at the  movies, even went so far as to let me invite her home for lunch one time. That girl certainly taught me a few things but none of them caused any damage or harm to either of us and in the end it just petered out of it's own accord.We have to let our kids make mistakes , take risks, date someone we don't approve of, or else how will they ever learn. Humans are meant to make mistakes, it's how we learn a lot of the time.By not forbidding it you may have a small measure of control, your son will also appreciate you having the confidence to allow him to grow ,  ... View more

Hi @Franny ,    From what you say, I think your daughter sounds really normal - teenagers range massively in terms of their development of romantic relationships, how they decide to express themselves physically, and in how they choose to express their sexuality. It's a time where a lot of teenagers are still working out who they are, who they're attracted to, and what they want from a romantic relationship.   Some teenagers are very demonstrative and affectionate, and some aren't. I think temperament can also play a role, I know from my experience as a parent one of my kids has always been much more physically affectionate than the other :)  It sounds like your daughter is moving at a pace that feels comfortable for her, and in a time where teenagers often seem to be pressured to be more sexualised in their appearance and how they act in relationships, I think that's a really admirable thing. It sounds like she has a clear idea of her own boundaries and what feels right for her :)    This article from Raising Children's Network has some good information based on research about teenagers and relationships, there's a huge variety in what a 'normal' relationship looks like.    Do you worry about her emotional well-being in other ways? You sound like a super caring and concerned mum, and I think it's almost impossible as a parent to stop worrying about our kids.      ... View more