07-14-2021 12:40 PM
07-14-2021 04:15 PM - edited 07-14-2021 04:15 PM
@Mominpain I’m so sorry for your pain, this is a very hard road to support your child through. Do you have support and people you can talk to?
I’m so glad that you’ve reached out for support here on the forums.
It's really protective that you have helped your daughter to access professional supports and you're working so hard to be there for her and to keep her safe.
You mention that your daughter is staying with her grandparents right now. Can I just check in about whether she is safe there? Do her grandparents know of the concerns you have and your daughter’s struggles with suicidal thoughts?
Knowing how to talk to teens about issues such as suicide is never easy, especially when they're struggling to share those thoughts with you.
We have some great resources on the ReachOut website that might be helpful if you're interested in reading some more about supporting your teenager to manage suicidal thoughts, how to talk to your teen about suicide and about social media and teenagers.
I hope this is helpful and please feel free to reach out here any time - we're here for you.
07-15-2021 12:57 AM
07-15-2021 10:53 PM - edited 07-15-2021 10:55 PM
Hey @Mominpain, it is great to hear that your daughter is safe with her grandparents. I can hear that you are in a really difficult position. You mentioned feeling unsure about bringing up the unpublished videos. What option are you leaning towards? Is this something that you are able to discuss with the therapist before your daughter returns? It might be helpful for you to have a safe space to vent and chat through strategies as I imagine this must be stressful and upsetting for you as a parent. Please feel welcome to keep us updated
07-16-2021 01:36 PM
Hi @Mominpain , how are you going?
I've been thinking some more about your daughter's situation and I found it interesting that she chose not to publish the Tiktok videos that you found on her phone. Perhaps she is using these videos as a form of journalling? I know that when I was a teenager, I would journal regularly to express my thoughts and get them off my chest, and some of these were darker thoughts that I didn't want to discuss with my parents in case they became more concerned than I was.
I can definitely see that you checked your daughter's phone from a place of love and concern, which is understandable since she's had some mental health challenges in the past. I also agree that bringing up the videos could damage the trust you have built with her since teenagers can be very protective of their privacy, and it may be best to have a conversation with her without mentioning the videos. I know that you've said she gets frustrated when you question her about what's going on, which makes having this kind of chat even more challenging. If you're interested, here are a few articles about asking questions to open your teen up to talking and some more subtle tips for finding out how your teen is going.
I can see that you're doing your very best during this tough time, and we are all thinking of you
07-16-2021 10:40 PM - last edited on 07-16-2021 10:42 PM by Sophia-RO
Thank you so much for your response. My husband and I also thought the videos could be an outlet in which she gets her frustrations out. When she was not herself last week she did say she figures it out her self and can cope and get herself out of it. The concern is that I just worry about the suicidal thoughts. It’s really devastating to me and I just want her to be ok. She is on medication. We may discuss uping the dosage she is currently on. Will that help I don’t know. She is still away so we have not been able to have any conversations about how she is feeling other than at times she feels stressed on vacation because she is rushed around. She also complaining of stomach pain on occasion and has vommited once while away and once before leaving. Is it anxiety? Something else?
07-17-2021 03:00 PM