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How do you know if your teen is depressed?

How do you know if your teen is depressed?

Prolific scribe

How do you know if your teen is depressed?

Hi everyone,
How do you know if your teen is depressed and it's not just normal teen up and down emotions?
My 14yr daughter has expressed she feels she may be depressed, has said she is losing interest in her sports, school, friends etc. She broke down and cried and asked me to take her to the Dr. Which I did. Dr has referred to counselor.
Think my daughter was hoping for a quick fix to stop her feeling sad. I'm just looking for a parent who has been through this or going through and any advice they have.

Thanks in advance

Re: How do you know if your teen is depressed?

Hey @Moloko it's definitely a hard one no doubt. Of course at that age there is a surge of hormones which certainly can result in feeling depressed. I think you're right too there's a bit of a misconception especially regarding young people that there is some kind of 'quick fix'. Sounds like a pretty good Doctor to me, referring onto a counsellor is a really good first base. Has she mentioned anything that may be causing her change in emotional health? I will tag some parents for you too Smiley Happy 


@sunflowermom @Orbit64 @Schooner

Prolific scribe

Re: How do you know if your teen is depressed?

Hi @Moloko


My suggestion is meet with the counsellor yourself.

Get a sense of what they are like and identify key things you hope the counselling is to achieve.


Make sure you also let your daughter know that if the counselling is not working for her, to tell you early on and try and find one that does work. Don’t just persist with the same one if it is not helping. 


My wife sought counselling help due to the problems with my son and the first counsellor she got actually contributed to an increase in her anxiety and problems. It was actually better for her to find a good masseuse, do some yoga at home (there are great routines on YouTube to watch on an iPad to take you through) and this helped more. In other words, do things that help you too. 

Parent Community Champion

Re: How do you know if your teen is depressed?

Hi @Moloko

I totally understand your daughter feeling upset that there is not a quick fix.  I honestly thought ok 6 months and things will be same old again.  I probably asked the therapist for a timeline.  I agree with @Orbit64 that its important to find a therapist that your daughter is comfortable with.  I think my daughter knows by the 2nd or third visit if it is someone she can work with.

I am so glad your daughter came to you and expressed that she might be depressed.  That is HUGE!  It speaks volumes for your relationship and the fact that she wants help.  That's one of the biggest steps for healing.

The things that helps my daughter on this journey have been NOT isolating in her room, art.... actually any form of self expression, long hot baths and yoga.  I have also had to back off and not ask her every 5 minutes if she is okay.  I think in some ways my wanting to "fix" her gave her more anxiety.  

Your daughter will get through this but it will take time.  Hugs.... We are here for you!

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