No friends

[Caz123]

My 14 year old son doesn't seem to stay friends with anyone and finds it difficult to make friends at all. My heart is breaking for him, at the moment he has no one at all...im at my wits end with worry. He is quite quiet and he finds it difficult to speak to people. Any advice?

[MaryRO]

HI @Caz123,

It can be quite heartbreaking to see your son not being able to make a strong friendship group.  It must be so difficult to see this and not be able to change things for him and make things better.  

I'm wondering if you have had a chat with his school and see if there is any way that they can support him with making a friend(s). They may know of other children who are also struggling to make friends and find a way to pair them up with your son discretely.  I'm also wondering if the school is aware of any bullying that is happening?  A lot of children may choose to not discuss this with parents and this may be a factor of his shyness. 

Are there any activities he would like to do outside of school?  Would he be interested in starting up a sporting activity for example or another sort of activity that may not require much talking at first and can lead to building friendships over time?  Some sort of club that gets his interest might be a good place to start as he will be around others of like mind.  Are there any youth groups in your area that he would like to give a go?  

Here is a video that may help your son see that the is not alone:  https://au.reachout.com/videos/friendships

Articles to read:

https://au.reachout.com/articles/how-to-make-friends-at-school

https://au.reachout.com/delivered/friendships

[Lolos]

Well I will suggest you get him engage in sporting and other local activities where you live. Some of that nature may help him to help engage with kids of his age.

[Bassam99]

Hi I have a 15 old daughter that don’t have any friends she walks around the school by herself and she hates going to school and she cry’s all the time ,so I understand where your coming from it’s so hard and I don’t know what to do Either

[Lolos]

I think you need to see health  professional concerning your daughter  for proper referral, you should not take things lightly. It could leads to serious mental health  problem  the adage says  a stitch in time saves nine.  Kids face a lot challenges especially nowadays . 

[Janine-RO]

Hi @Bassam99 , I'm so sorry to hear that your daughter is also having such a tough time at school - it sounds heartbreaking as a parent to see your child suffering like that.  Mary has shared some great ideas and resources above- I'm also wondering if your daughter would be open to chatting with a counsellor or a psychologist about what she's going through? 

Headspace are a great place to start - they offer free services to young people aged 12-25, both in person, over the phone and online. You can find out more about them here. 

Kids Helpline are another great service, or a local GP can also be a good place to find out about local supports in your area and get a mental health care plan. 

Keep us posted with how you're getting on - we are always here to listen.