Teacher saying "death will come to you" to students

[Penny133]

Hi, a teacher at my children's catholic school that is a relief teacher has said to the students 5-12 "death will come to you" when they are miss behaving. She has said it to my daughter and nephew. My nephew asked her for help and she said "yes in hell". She hit my daughter with a spoon on her head and wacks the table to scare them.

She's around 26years old and is a new relief teacher.

I was wondering what your thoughts and suggestions are on this.

It's really upset me and my children. The school is a lovely school but I don't like what this teacher has done and I don't feel she should be teaching children.

I need any advice or info. Thank you

[Ngaio-RO]

Hello @Penny133 Welcome to Reach Out Parents! 

Thank you for sharing your story with us.

I was originally going to ask the age of the kids but, the truth is, it doesn't even matter.

Regardless of the age of the kids, this teacher is being abusive, both emotionally and physically.

It is fundamentally NOT ok to hit anyone, let alone young people. So without anything else, that is enough to report her. But, for me, using a child's religious beliefs to make them behave in class is appalling. 

Are you comfortable talking to the principal about this?

[motherbear]

Hi @Penny133 . This is absolutely not acceptable. I agree with @Ngaio-RO . This must be reported .  If you are not comfortable talking to the Principal then talk to the person in charge of Wellbeing or the Co-ordinator of the year level your child is in . This could have repercussions through out the school culture. The school community must be protected . This is verbal and physical abuse . I can't believe in this day and age this  has managed to become part of her repertoire of  behavioural management tools for children !! 

Suggestions : 

You may find when it is reported that the story " morphs " . The teacher may back peddle and say " oh that's not what I said " or " she mis understood me blah blah " .  This can be difficult to deal with . However , if that happens I would counter if it was me with , 

" Whatever  language and context you used , is not important , or in fact relevant here because  the OUTCOME was still the same , my daughter and nephew were distressed  and felt disrespected and mistreated .  There also  is NO time physical punishment is ever a response to a child doing anything she / he should not be . What ever you meant to say or do was received by the children as hurtful and upsetting and whatever method you used to get compliance has to change . 

Its that simple . Don't get fobbed off , or allow them to confuse you with weasel words . It's a classic deflection so people don't have to be accountable and for the school to save face. 

If the school does nothing substantial to ensure you feel protected and supported then go .the Catholic reporting body of the school you are in . This must be nipped in the bud . Best of luck and tell us the outcome , I would be interested to know how this one pans out !!! What a dousy ! 😤🤔

[motherbear]

Hi @Penny133 . This is absolutely not acceptable. I agree with @Ngaio-RO . This must be reported .  If you are not comfortable talking to the Principal then talk to the person on charge of Wellbeing or the Co-ordinator of the year level your child is in . This could have repercussions through out the school culture. The school community must be protected . This is verbal and physical abuse . I can't believe in this day and age this  has managed to become part of her repertoire of  behavioural management tools for children !! 

Suggestions : 

You may find when it is reported that the story " morphs " . The teacher may back peddle and say " oh that's not what I said " or " she mis understood me blah blah " .  This can be difficult to deal with . However , if that happens I would counter if it were me with , 

" Whatever  language and context you used , is not the point , or in fact relevant here because  the OUTCOME was still the same , and that is what matters.  My daughter and nephew were distressed  and felt disrespected and mistreated . You may not have intended to hurt but you did .  There also  is NO time physical punishment is ever a response to a child doing anything she / he should not be . What ever you meant to say or do was received by the children as hurtful and upsetting and whatever method you used to get compliance has to change . 

Its that simple . Don't get fobbed off , or allow them to confuse you with weasel words . It's a classic deflection so people don't have to be accountable and for the school to save face. 

If the school does nothing substantial to ensure you feel protected and supported then go .to the catholic reporting body of the school you are in . This must be nipped in the bud . Best of luck and tell us the outcome , I would be interested to know how this one pans out !!! What a dousy ! 😤🤔

[Penny133]

Hi thank you for your reply.
I have emailed the principal but now I'm waiting for school to go back and I'll ask for a meeting.
I did see another reply but for some reason it's gone.

I am worried that they will try to sweep the issue under the rug or try to make it seem not as bad.
This will make me angry if they don't take it seriously.

I have talked to other parents I know and their children have now said the same.

I feel bad my children didn't come to me sooner or no other children have. I know year 6 told their teacher but I don't know if she reported it or not.

I never heard anything about it to my children started talking about it they are 6-11.

I dont want the lady that's saying and don't nasty things teaching at their school. I don't want her teaching at all to be honest. I fear her behaviour won't stop.

She is meant to be teaching kindy (5year olds) next term so that scares me..

I just think a teacher should be caring and firm and teach the children good behaviours.
Be a good role model. I want my kids feeling safe at school.

I believe in disciple but in the right way that teachers them good management skills and to care for others around them.

I'm really not sure how anyone can be like that to kids.

[Ngaio-RO]

I completely agree with you @Penny133 Discipline is one thing but you can achieve it without aggression and threats.

Well done on contacting the Principal. Please let us know how things go fro you.

[motherbear]

Hi @Penny133 . I did write you an extensive replay but for some reason it was deleted . Anyway , my suggestions are definitely take it further if the Principal takes no real action . : to the catholic reporting body .

 You may find a lot of back peddling e.g " Oh that's not what I meant / said , blah  blah ....."  " The children misunderstood me ...  People do this to save face and the school will try to deflect blame with all the weasel words . Don't buy into it . Stick to your guns !!

The fact is whatever she actually  said , changes nothing  , as the outcome is  what matters and the outcome was, your daughter and nephew were hurt , upset , and abused !!! and her behavioural management strategies have to change so that the kids feel accepted and secure at school .You need to know that she understands that her style is not working and is wrong !  This is verbal and physical abuse and needs to stop yesterday .  Let us know how you go !  It's a dousy 😫😤

[Ngaio-RO]

Oh no @motherbear.  Where did your post go?

I'll see if I can work out what happened. I'm so, so sorry if it was an error on my part.

Completely agree with you btw.  She might try and pass it off as the kids misunderstanding but that doesn't change that she traumatised them

[GrhRo]

Very soory to read of this situation Penny133.

You have every right to be concerned and take action in this matter, and I support what others have replied.

There is no place for devistating remarks or agressive actions in the relationship a teacher has with their students. The teachers role is to nurture not injure, the later being a betrayle of trust and responsibility to the stuident, parents, and wider community.

Good luck with following this incident through. Do you have support from other parents of students who could collaborate your children's experiences with this teacher?

[Ngaio-RO]

Hi @Penny133 how are you both?
When you're able, do you want to let us know how you went?