daughter hostialized twice for suicidal intentions- im grieving

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Super frequent scribe

Re: daughter hostialized twice for suicidal intentions- im grieving

Hi @sunflowermom 

How are things going with you and your lovely daughter?   Last I heard, things were on an upswing. I dearly hope that the upswing has continued.


You had concerns about your daughter's pot use--how is that going now?  I don't know how others feel about it but, in many ways, I would rather have my daughter smoke pot than drink alcohol if a) the cannabis is high CBD/low THC and b) if she was confident about the source (i.e. that it is not laced with fentanyl etc.). 


I've talked with my daughter that pot with high THC is going to likely exacerbate her social anxiety (where some research has shown that CBD *may help with anxiety).  Of course, the research on the teen brain and cannabis is limited so, ideally, there would be no use of pot.  I guess I think that alcohol can lead to many impulsive and risky decisions.   Again, ideally, I wish I wasn't even having to choose the 'lesser of the evils'. 


To be clear, I'm not trying to talk you out of your concern. I'm wondering about the relationship between her pot use and mental health symptoms? Or what she feels is the relationship. 


I do think the question of 'safe supply' is important. 


I admire your openness with your daughter; the fact that she 'checks in with you' is such an important and reassuring sign.  

Star contributor

Re: daughter hostialized twice for suicidal intentions- im grieving

Hi @compassion 

Thank you so much for checking in on us!!  Actually, we are still doing really great.  She is going to school, no longer skipping any classes because I said you don't get allowance and you cant go anywhere on the weekend if you miss school. It has seemed to work- I also said no failing classes don't care the grade just no fails.

Currently on her own accord she is holding down a low B average, and has joined the school Softball team.  Even has a high school boyfriend though she confided that she is getting bored of him.  All this feels like typical teen stuff.

She has been smoking less often now, sometimes once a week. (probably because she spends her own allowance on it)  But it goes in waves of higher usage too. To be clear she is not on any other medication, we tried about 10 prescriptions and combos over the past year and a half simply didn't help her.  I am not anti meds ( at times they have worked wonders for me) but they didn't help her.

Her source for pot is good- since we are in California we have dispensaries and her cousin picks it up for her.  But then she can also get the levels of THC and CBD that she is looking for.  There are also rules or responsibility about the usage in our home- like- it doesn't go to school, she must smoke in backyard, nothing ever left out, she has a younger sister. Things like that.  There will be more rules once she gets her drivers license in a few months. 

I know all parents would not agree with allowing the pot smoking, but many teens smoke anyway without their parents knowledge. At least I have some knowledge about what's going on with her.

How are things going for you and your daughter?


Community Manager

Re: daughter hostialized twice for suicidal intentions- im grieving

Hi ,

So glad to hear that your daughter is engaging in school and extra curricular activities- reading back over this thread we can really see her recovery journey and the steps she has taken forward with your support Heart
Star contributor

Re: daughter hostialized twice for suicidal intentions- im grieving

Thank you @Jess1-RO !


I pray this brings hope to others going through what I have gone through.  Its a long journey and you will never be the same, but you will get stronger.  We didn't ask for these challenges as parents- but we can push through them and bring something to the other side   It gets better- just hold on!.

Casual scribe

Re: daughter hostialized twice for suicidal intentions- im grieving


Thankyou for sharing the recovery journey as the last person has put it. Your ongoing sharing has helped me over again in weathering my own journey with my handful of a beautiful but (wild) child daughter. Even when things have been good I feel I'm just waiting on the other foot to drop at times. Hearing the running away story was hair raising. I am yet to go through this and hope not to...ever. It sounded like you turned it to positive somehow, what a feat! Thanks for sharing these hair raising experiences & the learning you have had with your child with other parents like me. Take care
Star contributor

Re: daughter hostialized twice for suicidal intentions- im grieving

Hi @silverlining 

Your message was so kind last week.  We just got back from a family vacation  to Disneyland so my access has been limited.  I have had a incredibly tumultuous year and a half.  And honestly I never thought I would see the other end of it with a positive outcome.  I just want other parents to know it really will happen- I want to bring hope.  I know we all have different time lines and we wish we knew when the rollercoaster would end.  What we go through will forever change us and our teen- but you will have good times again and you will not be forever waiting for the other shoe to drop. I can honesty say I have gained a new perspective and I enjoy the little things way more. Thank you again for your wonderful message!