Hi @hotwired,
Thanks for sharing. It sounds like your daughter has a few different things going on for her which could be manifesting as this behaviour on the outside. From what you have described, it sounds like you have watched your daughter's behaviour change quite drastically in more ways than one. I imagine that it must be quite disheartening and upsetting to feel like these changes are a result of your shortcomings as a parent. I can hear that it has been quite difficult for you and your wife to manage your daughter's behaviour and that it has begun to take a toll on you as a family. You appeared to have offered your daughter a lot of varying support options, although she does not seem to be interested.
It is important for your daughter to know that she is loved (as you have already mentioned) and that you are there to support her. This could also involve using language that is sensitive and non-judgemental as it is important for young people to feel heard, respected and understood. As she is now an adult, it is up to her whether she chooses to take you up on the support that you offer. In regards to being homeless, if you feel this is a significant risk for your daughter, then it would be ideal to offer her some services she can access to assist with her living situation. As we are an Australian service, it is difficult for us to provide resources appropriate for your area but you are still welcome to continue using our forums. Another option is to explore other options with her - like living with other family members, her friends or friends of yours/your wife.
I am wondering if you or your wife have some support for yourselves? I know that this hasn't been easy for you or your wife and sometimes talking to a professional can help you process your emotions. You could also ask for additional strategies or other ways of going about the situation if you are interested.
Please feel welcome to keep updating us, we are here for you
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