As you are in the US you can contact hotline.org they are in every state with contact details and will walk you through the legal steps to help your girl. Some of this is normal teen behaviour - they are like toddlers, defensive, screaming, refusing, then the hormones. You and your younger children are being physically and mentally abused. If you can get trauma counselling for yourself first and the kids you will get off those horrible eggshells. Sometimes our teens need tough love and learn through their own mistakes to become adults. Have a look at the developing teenage brain at this young age it isn't developed much past a toddler. I hope this helps a lot. Women and domestic violence is also a website that should help you. You are brave you can do this big decisions cause horrible guilt. breathe, cry and breathe. And don't forget you are a fantastic mum and very strong. ... View more