I am worried about my 14 year old son.

[Sparkles85]

Hi, since the kids dad left 10years ago my 14year old son has took to technology to cope.
The kids dad was an alcoholic and drug addict, he would play video games all day and night and rage at me for nothing because I accidentally walked in front of the tv or whatever.
Now my son has taken up this trait which I am so pissed about.

My parents would take the kids to help me while I had a mental health break and catch up on housework and just breathe.
He has changed from the happy kid that used to be good at everything he did.
He has not been diagnosed but I am almost positive he is depressed, antisocial, emotional, aggressive, insensitive person who thinks everyone owes him everything.

I refused to buy broadband for this exact reason!
My parents would reward him with internet and buying him **bleep** online to help his addiction of fortnight and apex legends when he went to their house.

Then he would come home and rage at me for being poor and a **bleep** mum for not letting him do what he wanted or not being able to afford the crap he wanted on line.

I saw the signs and told the workers they did tell my parents to stop and get them to be on the same page!! Lol it's not funny but it's just **bleep** that my parents let my FN kids play online 24/7 and then blame me for the kids being turds at home.

I was forced into buying broadband, now getting yelled at everyday because it's so slow and always lags. I can't win.

Nothing I try is working and I don't know what to do because he is emotionally and mentally lashing out at me and his autistic sister which causes her to have meltdowns then I have a emotional rant and then cry because I feel I have failed as a parent.

I have mental health issues that stems from childhood trauma and domestic violence, I am getting the help I need to move forward and now I am able to notice the changes in others.

Sadly with me being so open with my mental health I have been put into a category and being stigmatized for being open in my mental health struggle in some peoples eyes is a sign of weakness by asking for help.

Thankyou.
I appreciate any tips or advice

[Jennifer-RO]

Hi @Sparkles85 

Welcome to the forums, we’re so glad to have you here with us.

Firstly, I would like to acknowledge the efforts you have been making for your family and am so happy you are receiving support for your own mental health issues. Being open about your mental health is unfortunately still sometimes stigmatised, so I want to commend you for your courage in recognising the importance of your own wellness and having the strength to ask for help and support.

I am so sorry that you have been going through such hard times with your son. I hear that this is an issue that you’ve tried to get support with previously. From the worker you spoke to, would you know if there are any additional resources they could refer you to? They may know of more services or resources in your area.

I hope other members will pop in here and be able to provide their insights and advice as their experiences may be insightful.

[Birdwings]

Hi Sparkles85,

Not quite sure what to say. You're going through so much and it's been such a long journey. Yet, you've kept going, persevered and tried to make the best of a difficult situation and get your son on track. I was wondering whether some support for families of alcoholics might be helpful and to share with some other mums in  your situation and  to get some really solid family support, Maybe you could get some local contacts from Reachout staff. Try to find some way of relaxing yourself, even if it's only a moment for a cup of tea. Trying to recharge with so much doing on is challenging but something to work towards. Thinking of you.

Best wishes,

Birdwings