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How to boost teens' confidence in areas that they are not so good at?

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How to boost teens' confidence in areas that they are not so good at?

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Contributor
readthemanual

How to boost teens' confidence in areas that they are not so good at?

Hi, everyone. I have got this question that I really need your input: my daughter does really well at school in almost all aspects. However, she gets really nervous in her maths tests which is one area that she feels she is not so good at. The result is she is always "not as good as she should be". She is a perfectionist and I am the opposite. Though I have never done as well at school, I always done better than I deserve in important exams. So I really cannot help with her problem and ease her anxiety. Is there anyone out there who could help?


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Mitzi

Re: How to boost teens' confidence in areas that they are not so good at?

I would try a simple combination of meditation and positive self-talk. Teach her to:

  • Take a deep breath and slowly let it out
  • Say "I have studied and prepared for this exam. I know this stuff. I can do this."

 

Repeat if necessary!

 

I can remember in Year 6 becoming very anxious about my exams. My mother gave me a little set of holy medals (we were Catholic in those days!) and said "I took these medals with me to every test and I never failed an exam." I took the medals and I neval failed an exam. At 12, I believed those medals would magically help me pass exams. Holding them made me confident.

 

I say do whatever works.

Contributor
readthemanual

Re: How to boost teens' confidence in areas that they are not so good at?

Thanks! Mitzi.
The medal part won't work,but I will see if she wants to try the positive self-talk.

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Luula

Re: How to boost teens' confidence in areas that they are not so good at?

@readthemanual I remember hating maths at school and I always told myself I wasn't good at it. I ended up getting a maths tutor for my HSC, who was able to explain things to me in a way that was easy for me to understand. This built up my confidence, and in turn I stopped telling myself I wasn't good at maths and I ended up doing really well in my exams.

 

Long story short, the things we tell ourselves matter, so @Mitzi's positve self-talk idea is awesome. Are there any other things you think might help build her confidence? 

Contributor
readthemanual

Re: How to boost teens' confidence in areas that they are not so good at?

yes, I guess a tutor would be our next step. Thanks for sharing your experience! @Luula


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JenniferS

Re: How to boost teens' confidence in areas that they are not so good at?

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interesting you bring this up.  i had this discussion with some friends the other day & came across this site:

http://personalexcellence.co/blog/overcome-perfectionism/ 

it had some great stuff in it

Contributor
Sophie-RO

Re: How to boost teens' confidence in areas that they are not so good at?

Hey @JenniferS, thanks so much! This is an awesome suggestion
Contributor
readthemanual

Re: How to boost teens' confidence in areas that they are not so good at?

Thanks a lot! @JenniferS
I reflect and realized I should praise her more and celebrate her achievements.

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