Hi All. I'm new to this forum. I'm a single mum of 2 boys, a 15 & 16 year old. My 16 year old is suffering from severe anxiety which is mostly due to school. He had always had some difficultly with learning..memory.. cognitive issues since being treated for leukaemia from ages of 7 to now. His chemotherapy was for a full 3 and 1/2 years... but he still struggles with cognition, so learning is a real struggle, even with all the aid and extra help put in place over the years. Only recently has it progressed to a more severe anxiety. Last year it turns out not only was he really struggling with study but was being bullied by a male teacher to the point where my son attempted to harm himself when asked to go back to school. This was before we found out about the teacher bullying him .. needless to say my ex pulled him out of that school and into another.. but that still has its problems because now my son has no real friends and his best mates whom he found support in are at the old school. This year in Jan my son refused to go to school . My ex came around to my house and demanded that our son get up and go to school .. That he wasn't taking no for an answer ... My son got up walked to kitchen and tried to hurt himself. My ex intervened but there was a struggle, my ex then got physical with our son. I will never ever get rid of the look of fear in my son's eyes ☹️. I tried to pull the ex off our son after which the ex started telling our son " What's the matter with you " I told ex to leave.. to get out.. that what he did was totally disgusting and wrong. Anyway, after I called police and made a statement and they talked to my son.. They suggested he go to emergency and that they would escort the ambulance there. At hospital after talking to mental health team there, we were referred to a psychologist . I've been to the new school to sort out what can be done to encourage my son back ... Even though at all interviews with professionals my son agrees to steps needed and short term goals.. When it comes down to it.. he doesn't follow through because he's so stressed. He has not been at school most of this year only 1 day which was before the incident with his father. My son is only happiest when on his computer with his mates as he say's they just get him.. I understand that social interactions are different to when I grew up . It's all about online in someway when it comes to my son's friendships. The social worker asked my son what he does to relieve stress or to calm down when thinking of self harm..and my son said gaming, online chat and graphic digital design .. To which social worker agreed that was a positive thing. I feel so alone..I know school is important.. but my son's well being is way more important..I know it's imperative to love your children for whom they are and what makes them unique...encouraging them as they get older, in what their passions are... not have unrealistic expectations of what we think they should do or be .I'm happy with whatever my child decides to pursue.. I'm just struggling with the situation now.. As it does seem so dim atm.
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