Teenagers friendships

[RHI22]

Hi have teenage girls friendships changed? They just dont seem to be there for each other, or have I just forgot what its like to be 17

[gina-Ro]

Hi @RHI22,  Teenagehood is tough, and girls need their friends to help them navigate and enjoy it, so I'm sorry to hear that that might not be the case for someone in your life. 

Being there for each other is friendship 101 - and I don't think we can generalise about all friendships or as a sign of changing times. 

Strong female friendship is possible and valuable for young people at the moment, as it always has been... but that doesn't mean every young girl experiences this.  Sometimes it takes a little while for young people to find people they can trust and build genuine friendship with... 

Do you want to tell us more about what's going on your end?

[RHI22]

Hi, i didnt mean to say the wrong thing. My daughter an only child, appears to find it hard to find that close friend, that is as you said  so important, not sure how i can help. 

[Breez-RO]

Hey @RHI22 I am sorry to hear your Daughter is struggling to develop close relationships with her friends. Has she opened up to you about what's been going on? Do you have any idea why, is she shy or new to the school or similar? We're here to listen. 

[RHI22]

She is very open and talks to me about it. She said that she isnt sure what she does, Im not sure if she might try too hard, when she was young she would have a friend, but didn't like sharing them with anyone else. 

[gina-Ro]

@RHI22 that's great that she is open in talking with you - sounds like you have a lovely relationship. 

Does she do anything outside of school - sports or hobbies? These can good places to make friends if school isn't a helpful place for friendships.

You might find looking at our content over here helpful around things you could try to support your daughter in her friendship making. 

What do you think?

[Schooner]

Hi @RHI22,

I'm a guy, so I didn't know what to expect with my two daughters. I was surprised at how btchy girls got, even at a young age. My oldest daughters best friends tended to be males, I think she found them to be more honest and down to earth (they also did stupid things, but that's what we guys do when we are young).

So, I don't know if it's changed, and I'd guess that it is different for everyone, but it does seem to be hard sometimes for a girl to find a real, supportive, friend.

Cheers

[brightstar89]

While I understand that having  close friends is important, it is not something that you can control. Sometimes your frequency and mindset don't match with others.  I had trouble finding trustworthy friends when I was a teen.  I spent my whole teen repenting not having cool people to hangout with. But now, when I think of it, I feel there is nothing wrong in not having friends. If I could say one thing to my teen-self, it would be 'You are unique. You are awesome. You don't need to change the way you are for finding friends'. I hope that you can encourage your daughter to embrace who she is and not feel dejected cos of lack of close friends. 

[RHI22]

Thank you I will read them

Liz

[RHI22]

My daughter has always gone and spent time with the boys, when it gets a bit too much with the girls.

My sone was very laid-back, loved to surf, and play football. Girls are a bit different, with social media they can see what others are doing, when I was that age we had to stretch the phone cord down the hall and into the bedroom. 😂

I sometimes think i worry too much , they can be really down one day, then top of the world the next. Its nice to hear others stories and opinions,

Thank you