12-30-2018 11:23 AM
My son is 15 he has been smoking pot for some time and is not the best in school and quite problematic. We are trying everything, counselling, grounding taking things away nothing works he will do what he wants. The thing we are tying most to do is stop him from smoking in the house, he just refuses to go outside he smokes in the house when we are not home and in his bedroom when we are home we are constantly talking to him about it and he lies endlessly I know he is smoking in the house and continuously denies It always ends up in a battle. does anyone have any ideas.
12-30-2018 02:40 PM - edited 12-30-2018 02:49 PM
Hi @ihavefailed thanks for reaching out to us. It sounds like a really difficult position to be in, particularly when you feel like you have tried everything. The counselling support he received was that from a specialled Drug and Alcohol Counsellor or School Counsellor? Did they provide any helpful strategies? I'm going to tag some of our members for further support and advice @Dad4good @sunflowermom @compassion @Schooner
12-30-2018 04:35 PM
12-30-2018 05:23 PM
12-30-2018 06:58 PM
I’m with you . I can’t stop him . So have decided to stop trying . All the talking in the universe seems to have no effect . Have just said to him when you are ready to stop and get on with your life let me know. He’s a nice kid, and I’m sure it’s a phase due to boredom . He is now 16 , and is still obsessed..with this and Fortnite . But in a way feel it is better than alcohol..He has ambition , and I say you won’t get a job turning up high etc . And there will be no driving lessons etc if you are still smoking . So we are very open about it now . Does ok at school . Hang in there , and just keep communication open .dont make everything about the weed 😊
12-30-2018 09:30 PM
12-30-2018 09:46 PM
Well, its not what Id like to see him do! but after 18 months of sneaking around his bedroom and getting cross, figured that he will do it anyway, and the decision will have to be his .its a tricky thing, as don't want our communication to always be about it. I truly think its a phase for this age group, and the main thing is to make sure it doesnt lead onto harder drugs. We talk openly about it. and knows we are disappointed that he chooses to do this. but we are NOT disappointed with him, and love all his other strengths etc .my other 2 older sons have aspergers and autism ..so bit of a full house with special needs!!!
12-31-2018 03:42 AM
01-03-2019 04:47 PM
thanks for your insight on this one @sunflowermom - so good to hear about the improved communication and situation. I think your thinking about acceptance and slow behavior change is a really good way to look at it.
Sometimes we have to accept the choices teens make and think of ways to improve the situation, or minimize harm, rather than take a hard line approach.
@ihavefailed how is everything going for you this week? Thinking of you
04-28-2019 08:44 AM