Hi @Deezzee it sounds like you have raised a hard working young man .My boys were often disrespectful when they were younger due to my boundaries not being defined enough. They are now 25 & 21 and seem to have grown up and grown out of it. My daughter 17 who has anxiety often puts me down and calls me deaf when I can't hear her so I can empathise. Teenagers have a lot happening with hormones, self esteem issues etc. They often lash out at the ones closed to them. Also the male brain doesn't fully develop until they are around 30 I think. Can you try telling him that he needs to be more respectful to you and his words often hurt you? And meanwhile start setting some boundaries slowly of what you will put up with, that's what I'm trying to do. All the best. Ps mods please note I'm going off this site as my name is identifiable but coming back as someone else . Thanks ... View more

Hey @Dj1234 it's good you and your daughter are speaking as it's half the battle with teenagers I think. I agree with Erin RO things have certainly changed since we were younger in relation to social media it was non existent. Maybe wait until things cool off for a while before talking about it again with your daughter. Can you ignore this for a while as it may be a phase she is going through? Sometimes as a parent I'm finding when I speak/lecture/ nag less is more. ... View more

Hi @ Dj1234 it sounds like a very stressful situation you and your family are in. Are you on speaking terms with your daughter at the moment? I understand that you don't want you daughter dating this guy but I think if you say she can't see him she will want to see him even more. Can I suggest that you try to have this guy over for dinner etc and speak to him about the photos and get him to delete them in front of you and also ask if he has shared these photos and to whom and which platform. It's going to take a lot of strength on your part to do this calmly but the sooner the better and if they have been shared speak to the relevant people on how to remove the photos. Unfortunately this sexting is very common among teens though that doesn't make it any easier when it's your daughter involved. Good luck ... View more

Gee @Mssassy how frustrating for you I totally get it as my ex was very similar with my kids when they were younger . My boys used to go there every second week and I didn't have much contact in that time as they didn't have phones then. He and his partner tried to control everything. In the end I only fought the battles that were worth it. The rest I just learned to ignore. My daughter lived with me most of the time but my sons went to live with their dad when they both were around 12 full time as that's pretty much the age where they can decide on their own. A very painful time ,I had limited contact except every second weekend and soccer training. They are now 25 & 21. I have a great relationship with the 21 year old and the 25 year old we are still working at it. But guess what I haven't spoken to my ex in months, he has no control anymore the kids are adults and not at home and independent. But for all the pain I went through I have a relationship with them without interference . Have you heard the saying children are on loan until they are 18. Trust me when I tell you he is nearly an adult and very soon his father will have no hold over him. I have been told my ex was emotionally abusive before and after the marriage but I didn't realise. Hang in there all the best. x ... View more

Hi @ Mssassy sorry to hear about your communication issues with your son. It's quite rude to be checking your sons messages considering he is 17 in any case. It sounds a bit like bullying to me. You have every right to message your son without interference. Can you just try texting or a phone call? I don't know your situation but can you meet for a coffee after work or school for a chat? Good luck ... View more

Thankyou @Nervous I will take at look at it. 😊 ... View more

Thanks @ sunflowermom , great suggestion about mood app I will look in to it. 😊 ... View more

Hi @taokat. Sorry to hear you are having such a bad time atm. A bit of bad timing with the medication for your daughter eh. It's great that your daughter is able to attend tafe though. Tai chi sounds wonderful and relaxing and a great way to stay grounded. I have been walking a bit which keeps me more relaxed and positive. It's sounds like you are a very caring and giving mum taokat sometimes we have to give up so much to look after our precious ones. I was fortunate to be able to hold down a job as I'm self employed and could come home at lunch and also take my daughter to work as well. ... View more

Thankyou@Breez-RO 😊 ... View more

Thankyou @Zoesplace yes it is much easier to talk when we are all feeling calmer. I'm just going to soak it in and enjoy the good days 😊Today we took our kelpie x to an offleash park which is really good and she can open up and talk to people, I can see she finds joy in this. We are also looking into volunteering at the pound which I will go to as well and then hopefully be able to leave her there later on. ... View more

Hi everyone thanks for your support . I just wanted to share that my daughter and myself have had 2 good days. A lot has to do with my attitude. Today I was able to go to the river after work and relax a bit before I went home. I was able to come home feeling good and not reacting to things so easily. We had a chat this week when things were calm and was able to get from my daughter that her studies(yr 12) are stressing her out and also my reactions and my moods. So I have to admit to her, myself and you guys that my reactions made her more withdrawn and we unfortunately were always at each other because we were BOTH moody and irritable, this was so hard for me to realise. I really have to take a long hard look at myself and try to improve this as I think I have been living on edge for quite a long time . I actually have anxiety too which I guess feeds off her anxiety. Urgh. Any way none of us are perfect but we need to look at how we are speaking and reacting as we can be unknowingly hindering communication with our teen. Good luck guys.Thanks for listening enjoy your weekend 😊 ... View more

Thanks @sunflowermom I will keep this in mind 😊 ... View more

Sorry I just repeated myself I didn't think previous post went through ... View more

Thanks for your words of support @Zoesplace. Sometimes I wonder where my sweet girl has gone I know she's in there somewhere! ... View more

Hi @Zoesplace, thanks for your kind words and support. Sometimes I wonder where my sweet girl has gone and has been replaced by the exorcist , she is so angry and defensive and that's when we are not even arguing. I'm going to wait until she cools down a bit and ask her why, I know she is stressed with the hsc but am wondering is it worth it if it is making her so stressed? I told her I am not bothered by her mark but she feels under pressure to do well. ... View more

Thanks@Breez-RO Will definitely read it and try to look after myself ... View more

Hi @Jupiter my heart goes out to you, it's so painful as a parent to watch this happen to your child. This is the age my daughter started having problems. Social media just makes it worse when they Snapchat where they've been. I agree with the previous post sorry I can't see atm who wrote it about joining a group outside of the school and also a sports or social group within the school as it can get him to make friends outside of his normal group. It's definitely a hard time as these kids are little fish in a big pond now and some kids can be mean and nasty to boost there own popularity . I agree too long to wait for a therapist. Google some in your area and make a few calls to see how long the waiting period is, it would really help. Do you have a dog? My daughter benefited greatly from getting a dog and will be more confident when she is out with her. You can also go to off leash dog parks where dogs and people can socialise. You sound like you are caring and supportive Jupiter I'm sure you will all get there soon. Good luck x ... View more

Hi @Breez-RO I'm feeling better that I shared my story though I find it hard to ask for help as I usually help others. I'm hearing a lot about boundaries lately and definitely need to work on them it's really hard to set them when your child is anxious and depressed as you think it can make things worse. Thanks everyone for your support ... View more

Hi @sunflowermom thanks for your kind words and support . . Sometimes people just don't get it even if they are close they think if your kid looks ok on the outside they're fine. I even had a doctor say she's fine look she's smiling. Wow we use that as a joke now! Yes it does feel like we are just going day by day at times. I'm so glad I found this forum and hopefully we can help each other , cheers 😊 ... View more

Hi Hippy Chic , good to hear he is doing well. You sound very supportive of him. Nothing wrong with not partying or playing footy he will find something he enjoys. There is so much pressure for kids to be like everyone else but friends have told me the individual quirky kids fit in great at uni or work. ... View more

Hi Breez thanks for your reply I have been doing yoga for 3 years but have moved so looking for another class close by.I also walk 3-4 times per week which helps a lot. I tried counselling a few weeks ago but she wasn't a good fit for me and made me feel worse I am going to look into another one recommended by a friend. Glad to know I have support here thankyou x ... View more

Hi Hippy Chick, your son may have anxiety and also be quite shy and sensitive. My daughter refused to go to school from year 8 and has been homeschooled. I understand your frustration but it's great he has a couple of friends and is still going to school . Can he get a part time job to boost his confidence and I strongly recommend a psychologist which has helped us tremendously. I think we all need to remember that some of our kids will be the quiet introverted ones, nothing wrong with that as long as they can function in the real world. All the best . ... View more